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to direct the married couples seeking BiF's away from this forum, either to another forum, or simply off to a non-CL swingers site. AFAICT, most of these folks are NOT coming here to disrespect you or your lifestyle, to maliciously disrupt, to treat someone as a sex toy (any more than ANYONE having casual or FB sex does) or anything like that. Look its a fact that lots of people come to biness, bicuriosity, or not quite biness relatively late in life, for any number of understandable reasons. Given the commoness of marriage in our society, its not surprising that most such folks are married. Men, facing the homophobia of even "liberal" str8 women, arent often going to come looking for a "third" theyre more likely to be wrestling with the issues cheating in various forms. Bicurious married women, often (though not always, of course) having husbands eager for the voyeuristic pleasures of watching their wife with another woman, are likely to getting a female third as an option. Naively, its a VERY logical option. The notion that its "using someone as a toy" or "based on a stereotype of promiscous bis and gays" probably doesnt occur to them. For good reasons. Whether or not casual sex has any place in life, it certainly DOES have a place in str8 life today, from one night stands, to Friends with Benefits, to less then deeply committed "relationships". Its not illogical for them to think that they could find similar with a BiF. They also are almost certainly not conscious that there preference for a BiF over a couple, where the male of their partner actually have to a GASP!, represents a certain level of "homophobia" itself. Also the idea that a BiF doesnt want an inexperienced female not be that odd either. Lots of Str8 males have no problem with an inexperienced female, and they have picked up on the existence of a subset of males who like inexperiened males. they also dont know how often youve seen this stuff before (well lurking before posting is a good idea, but thats not an issue thats unique to bi forums, by any means)or what the ratios are. Lots of people who dont spend a lot of time on forums are aware of how widespread certain common fantasies are. A faq could perhaps be useful for some other issues as well.

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