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I recently had a relationship of 7 years, culminating in marriage end when I found out that the trusted of my life was not who I had thought she was. I concluded I had had exceptionally poor judgement of character, and I had wound up with one of the bad ones, a minority in society. Then the Petraeus thing came up on the news. Marriage and fidelity became a discussion topic and I was shocked an horrified at what some people were saying. Claiming that studies suggest a majority of people would cheat if their significant other never found out, and that cheating is just a fact of life, after all "people are only human". And suggesting that keeping your partner satisfied could limit the risks I have always felt that cheating was one of the worst offenses anyone can ever commit, including murder, rape and any number of really bad things. I have never cheated on anyone, ever. Even if I knew they were certain never to find out, I would still know, and I couldn't live with the knowledge that I had betrayed someone who cared about me. I was absolutely disgusted at the suggestions that it is "human nature" or that it was somehow the victims fault for not satisfying their partner. A relationship is about so much more than just physical desires. It is a deep emotional bond between two people to dedicate themselves to each other. Even if someone knew they would never have sex again with their partner, this would still never justify infidelity. How can something as trivial and unimportant as sex drive even enter into this conversation as some sort of justification. It boggles the mind! don't get me wrong, I'm human, I like sex, but it just seems so trivial and silly in comparison do the absolute betrayal of an important person in your life. Perusing through the personals sections on this very website I find the oft mentioned requests for a "booty friend while I'm in a distance relationship" or "married woman seeking married -" absolutely vomit inducing. I can't help but think of who they might be cheating on, if they know, and how they'd feel if they found out. I also don't mean to suggest that all relationships should be forever, but at the very least make a clean break before betraying your significant other. So is it true? Is fidelity really dead? If so, I have given up on humanity. I'll never date again.
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