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You look like a cheater in 'open' guise. Yes, we can that you've already placed what you probably think looks like an innocent personal ad. Does your term SO know? If not, cut her loose, because you're going to damage her. You do not seem trustworthy enough to handle open. However, if she is aware of your straying mind/eye and is fine with it, you can try to learn new ways of being adventurous in bed, but if you think you can change someone to want what you do, you'll be disappointed. I've posted in the kink forum for as as I've had my handle, and can count on one hand the number of posters for whom 'open' has worked out. It's rarely just sex . listen to your partner and gut. Sometimes sexual incompatibilities are deal breakers. Jealousy and insecurities tend to keep people from trying (and being successful) and for good reason. It's incredibly hard to find a good match and you'd have to be open to her sleeping with other men and liking sex with them more. Then there's rule breaking to think about and how you would deal. If you want a threesome because you've never had one and think it seems fun it can be incredibly awkward (when does he/she leave). Does your partner even want this? These are just a few questions to think about. Try posting in kinkfo, but my opinion is that if you're not happy in bed, its better to not introduce other people. Work on it yourselves, and if you can't be prepared to part ways. Also, if you ever want a high level govt job . the lifestyle poly would probably not go well. Oh, and my personal experience? I just wanted sex with my ex to be better. Near the end, I asked for an open relationship got it and he found my ad and freaked out about how I embarrassed him until I cried. I realized he found my ad while looking for other women though he claimed he didn't want another woman. So.. things ended a few months later and that was that. My husband and I have a great life together including sex. We both know that sharing *could* be fun, but isn't for us and never be. We keep our sex life fun by talking about what we want to try.. and then doing it. In your case, take a break and explore your sexuality on your own don't pressure her into something she only do to try to make you happy/stay.

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